Did Calvin Kill Miguel Servetus? No.

Not Jewish, but…

a Jewish friend shared this with me.  And since we share the fact that we don’t recognise Christmass, I thought it was cute:

Training Loving Hearts

• “I have no greater joy, than to hear my children walk in truth..” III John 1:4
• “Train up the child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6
• “Oh, that their hearts would be inclined to fear me and keep all my commands always, so that it might go well with them and their children forever!” Deuteronomy 5:29

Amazing Grace

There are those that had everything and then later in life, just throw it all away.

Then there are those that had thrown away everything throughout life, that when they finally come to the end of themselves find Grace waiting for them.

What is “Childhood”?

We’ve noticed that people seem to answer either one of two way: 1) childhood is a time to be a “kid”. 2) childhood is a time of training for adulthood and enter society.

Which presupposition were you raised under? Which presupposition are you training your children under? Which one is true?

The past couple of generations we’ve seen a trend of theory #1. Parents aren’t doing their job if their children don’t have what other children have, parents having to go into debt for a stack of boxes under a tree on the biggest pagan holiday of the year, and heaven’s should have to lift a finger doing what is supposed to be “mom’s” or “dad’s” job.

Where did these ideals come from? From a society that entered another “golden era”, where psychology and her prophets came into reign in society’s mind, and where people blindly follow the quest for material possession and status.

What has been the result? A tipped over scale of two income families, dramatic inflation, and a severe decrease in pay, raises, and benefits. Bored children, latch-key kids, tv and x-box babysitters, over extended adolesence even into the thirties, sociological disorders, uncontrolled behaviours, and families where the members are detached, physically and emotionally, from eachother.

Who’s benefitted? The psychiatrists, the pharmaceutical companies, the education system’s pocketbooks (though their staff’s sanity is suffering from the overload of problems they face daily), the welfare system, the foster care system, cable tv, the gaming industry, drug dealers, and the coroners.

Childhood is a time of training. Yes, this can be enjoyable. But if the balance is tipped towards only play and being a “kid”, then several things happen.

1) a child becomes self focused…the world is only about him/her
2) a child doesn’t gain an understanding of the world or their cooperative role in it
3) a child doesn’t gain a sense of purpose

If we look around us, we see a generation of “lost children” ranging in age between 11 and 30. Most don’t know where to begin, lack basic skills, and just wander.

Training is very important…and not just educational. A person can become an encyclopedia and still not function. It is amazing what a child can accomplish, the sense of purpose it gives them, and the joy it brings to them.

My six year old used to have problems with tantrums. No kind of discipline worked for him…we couldn’t find what would reach his heart. He’s much like my husband…so we looked back at my husband’s childhood. He was never asked to do anything…an adult could always do it better or his brother was always asked. He felt invisible, lost, and useless. You cannot imagine the joy and pleasure that lit up my son’s face when I started giving him simple chores. He has now taken over the chore of turning over laundry…he has deemed that HIS territory…and he is proud of it. He has a purpose and something that he is good at. (turning over laundry is simply moving what’s in the dryer into momma’s room and what is in the washer into the dryer)

Each of our children have a room that they are responsible for. They receive plenty of help as they are learning. They are proud of having responsibility and being trusted with such. They are also learning skills. Amoungst the regular chores we have as a family (we all work together at the same time), we have added areas that will bless them later and give them a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment…the “I did that!”. We’re putting in a garden. Might a few plants get squashed having the three year old in it? Certainly! But we teach her how to be gentle and cautious. If there is enough produce, we may even sell some of it (from what the children sell, they will learn to manage their own money!) and give some of it to others (compassion and generosity). We hang out our laundry in the spring and summer here. I’ve missed doing this and am so happy to be able to do it again. It’s relaxing…laundry gets done faster…no more waiting on the dryer to put in the next load. This is also a family event. Being as far along as I am, bending over is trying. Nothing like extra hands helping to hand items to be hung or managing clothes pins. They even like checking to see which ones are dry and informing momma! (What child doesn’t like being an “informer”…and this beats tattling on siblings!) My oldest daughter is learning to handsew. She is making items for her hope chest.. She has a sense of purpose, to be a Keeper at Home, to take care of others and enjoy doing it. Our oldest son will soon be helping his daddy with weekend projects in the woodshop. Even if he goes to medical school (which he has talked about since 3yrs of age), he will have a skill to fall back on or support his way through school. He won’t be left without a sense of purpose…he will be able to provide for his family before he has one.

Too many children are shoved into school and then activities. Activities are good and fun. Hiking, sports, etc. But where will it carry them? We need to give our children a sense of cohesive family responsibility. What if they never have a family? They already have family. Even in singleness, there are usually parents, siblings, and neices or nephews. Having an understanding of familial responsibility also gives them an understanding of their responsibility to the community around them. Taking care of others, integrity and responsibility on the job, etc. They take both pride in what they do and at the same time are willing to humble themselves to understand and help another out rather than sit back and criticize.

If you’ve been reading this blog for a time, you might remember a book I was reading about Martha Washington. If not, go back a few pages and then look for the book in your library and read it…it is excellent. Martha’s mother, by the time she was fourteen, could manage a household during one of the most difficult of eras. Her list of skills included, but were not limited to, candlemaking, caring for chickens and livestock, candling eggs, making everything from scratch…bed linens, clothing This meant actually spinning threads and weaving the materials first. Gardening, cooking (the hard way), preserving (canning, drying, and smoking), and butchering (I’ve done this with chickens and turkeys…it is time consuming and not the easiest job, but not as difficult as many think either). She was also the oldest child and a girl. She knew how to care for younger siblings and how to care for common mild illnesses. She knew how to prepare for company, be a gracious hostess, and what the social rules were. All this and she technically came from a middleclass home.

I know standards have changed. I know that I don’t expect my children to have these specific skills and definately not by age fourteen. But we can see that it was people like Martha’s mother that built our country. They had a sense of purpose, didn’t bemoan it, and felt accomplished by it. She learned to become an adult…not an adult child. And if you read old journals or listen to stories told by grandparents and great grandparents (pre WWII), you will find that they were not only trained to be adults in childhood, but that they also still enjoyed childhood. My stepfather rebuilt his first car engine at age 12…but my great grandmother never did figure out why the family radio stopped working (grandfather had removed it’s guts to see how it worked!).

Childhood should be purposeful and fulfilling.

(as this post is being imported from another blog of mine, I am also transfering comments)

David McCrory Says:
April 25th, 2007 at 1:20 pm e

Nice blog. Thank you for the link. We often say around our church that we aren’t raising children, we’re raising adults.

What Patriarchy is NOT…

Patriarchy is the view that the Husband and Father is head of the home. He is the Provider and Protector of those under his care. He is the Spiritual Leader of the home, with his wife serving in that capacity in his absence.

Patriarchy does NOT mean:

1. The husband is the ONLY person the children may hear teach. Children may sit in service and listen to the minister, in fact should sit in service and listen to their minister.

2. The wife has no voice of her own. Her husband MAY encourage her to think for herself and be able to phrase what she believes and why in her own words. He MAY also seek her counsel in matters, particularly concerning the children or issues that affect them as a family or a couple. She is merely to submit to his end decision, however.

3. That a woman must go through men in ALL circumstances to discuss an issue or resolve an issue with another woman. Scripture teaches that a) women are to teach women and b) we are to go directly to a person if we feel we may have offended them in any manner.

4. That widows or single women must hand over their accounts, possessions, or account books to the church simply because they have no husband. Women are capable and shown in scripture as being capable, in an approving manner, of managing their own financial affairs when a husband is not present. This is not the church taking care of the widows, it’s rather the church seeking temptation and oppurtunity to steal from widows.

5. That every woman is subject to any and all men. One man has no authority over another man’s wife and therefore should a) not speak as though he has such authority over her nor with disrespect and b) should apologise directly to her as well as, but not only, to her husband. To do so treats the woman as God did not intend, a thing or an animal.

Some may wonder what brought this post about. This post has been a long time coming.  Many on the more liberal parenting boards mistakenly believe, because of negative examples they have seen, that these and much worse (spousal abuse) are what Patriarchy stands for…Real Biblical Patriarchy does NOT! These are simply examples I have seen over the past many years. These are the people that have taken patriarchy to an extreme, and misused if not abused, position. This is what those that speak against patriarchy usually think of when they hear the term. This, however, does NOT represent an example of what REAL Patriarchy is. A Husband and Father is not simply the Provider and Protector physically. He is also the uplifter of those he cares for. His wife is his Queen, reigning beside him. They treat eachother with respect toward each of their positions. She is not a serf to his Landownership. When there is an issue with a family, the entirety of the marriage (the husband and wife) are both to be spoken with as one will hold information the other may have forgotten or not be privy to for various reasons. Only those that would attempt to cause division within a marriage would do otherwise. REAL Patriarchy, recognizes the Strengths in each role and gender as God created them.

(due to transfering this post from another blog I am taking down, I am importing the comments as well, as they are worth keeping)

The Blessing of Being a Parent

“Are you blessing mommy when you do that?” and “That is not blessing mommy when you do that!” Those are statements that I have been hearing lately. They bothered me for some reason. But the wise woman keeps her mouth shut…for now. I decided to put more thought into it the other day to try to figure why it was pricking my conscience. What was it that just didn’t seemed right? Turn to the scriptures.

Pr 31:28 “Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.”

That can’t be it, can it? I believe this is the verse that is being used…or rather misused. Look at the verses that precede it.

Pr 31:10-27 “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.
She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.
She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.
She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.
She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.
She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.
She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.
She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.
She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.
Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.
She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

See anything here? She doesn’t demand that her children or husband bless and praise her. She earns it. It is something that comes after the fact.

Should we expect proper behaviour from our children? Absolutely…but we are to teach them to it, not guilt them into it. Yep, that is exactly what it is. Don’t do anything that makes mommy look bad. But the scriptures don’t say anything about a child being there to make the parents look good. We are dealing with little ones with a natural bent towards sin. We have to teach them…and pray that the Lord does a work in their hearts. When children are little we start by training them…showing them that actions have consequences, both positive and negative. As they get older we move from training to teaching. This is where we explain things to them and they continue to make choices…most times based on the condition of their heart. You can have a child that is trained to behave perfectly and yet have a rebellious heart and behave for the most selfish of reasons…this is not what we are called to produce with our efforts, but it is what we will get if we are guilting or strongarming our children into it. Let’s teach them to desire Gdly things by our own responses.

Tending the Vines

Last evening was beautiful.  We spent much of our time outside, weeding, spending time with the neighbours, passing around the cherry bowl, and tending the grape vines.

While tending the vines,  I started remembering how Christ compared the church to a vine.  I could see why this choice comparison.  I could see even more similarities than what had been mentioned in scripture as I went along.

Christ’s comparisons:

Joh 15:1  I Am that true vine, and my Father is that husband man.

Joh 15:4  Abide in me, and I in you: as the branche cannot beare fruite of it selfe, except it abide in the vine, no more can ye, except ye abide in me.

Joh 15:5  I am that vine: ye are the branches: he that abideth in me, & I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruite: for without me can ye doe nothing.

Jam 3:12  Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.

Joh 15:2  Every branch in me that beareth not fruit he taketh away: and every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it, that it may bring forth more fruit.\

Rom 11:18  Boast not against the branches. But if thou boast, thou bearest not the root, but the root thee.

Rom 11:19  Thou wilt say then, The branches were broken off, that I might be grafted in.

Rom 11:21  For if God spared not the natural branches, take heed lest he also spare not thee.

What I noticed:

The dead vines: still hanging in with the rest of the vines…had to be broken off so as to make way for the good vines.

The old vines: they look dead, but upon closer inspection, there were shoots all along them.  Some not so recent or toward the end…but rather spread out along their length.  These vines aren’t dead, they aren’t useless.  They have produced fruit abundantly in their time, are the bearers of smaller/newer vines, and are used as support by the newer/more vibrant vines.  This is how many of the elderly in our church are.  They have a different role than they once had.  They have produced fruit, they still bear the fruit of the gospel to others along the way, and they are the support of the youth of the church…they are our teachers, those that have been aged in wisdom and offer of that to the rest of us.

The fallen vine: This is NOT the dead vine.  The fallen still produce fruit, but they are slowly weakened, they are entangling themselves in the weeds and brush of the ground.  They simply need to be lifted up and their vine ends reattached to the support wires and other vines.  For some of these vines, it takes more work…for others less.  These are the discouraged in the church.  Those that have left off of the assembling of the church body.  Those that have become caught up in the world.  But still part of the vine.  Not hopeless…just needing help.

The weak vine: We came across these as we were working with the fallen vines.  They were smaller, but they were limp and had wee little leaves…not spry and strong like the other young starts.  They couldn’t hold themselves up, as they were lost in the muck of the overgrowth of the other vines and the fallen vines.  I had to lift them and lay them on stronger vines, in hopes that they will recover and grow and bear fruit.  We have those in the church that are weak.  They struggle to grow and they do find themselves lost amidst the other vines.  They are easily dragged down.  But all they need is to be lifted and be supported by a stronger vine.  Cared for until they become strong and healthy.

The smothering vines:  The vines are older and have born many starts and fruit…but they start smothering eachother, competing for space and to overtake.  We were in discussion at the time of how in many churches, people pick on eachother constantly.  They brag on their fruit…but they also judge others fruit by their own and criticize, or strangle, what fruit is there.  Their fruit becomes weak and they strangle those they should be holding up and working alongside.

Diseased vines: these vines have become infested with disease and bugs…churches that have fallen for false and destructive doctrine and practices.

Condemned vines: Deu 32:32  For their vine is of the vine of Sodom, and of the vines of Gomorah: their grapes are grapes of gall, their clusters be bitter.  Thes are the vines that mimic the other vines…they bear fruit even…but their fruit is distasteful and bad.  These vines must be destroyed to keep from mingling and infecting the true vines.  The church is being courted and overwhelmed by the world.  One day the vine keeper will destroy all these vines of Sodom and Gommorah.

Mothers’ Day?!

Yes, I’m a mother.  Just want to clarify that.

We visited a relative’s church for a special occasion today.  It also happens to be “Mother’s Day”.  We bought the obligatory flowers, chocolate, scented lotion, and card for my mother-in-law.

In our churches we don’t do the usual seasonal messages…in fact, they bug us.  We celebrate no Holy Days other than the Lord’s Day.

This being an average evangelical church, the sermon was on Mothers and Mothers’ Day, starting with the email forward I believe we have all read (the one that describes what you do with the first baby compared to the second and the third).  The sermon was decent in and of itself.  However, it hit me…we were celebrating “Mothers’ Day” and mothers!  What day is this?  WHO are we supposed to be celebrating and worshipping?  It certainly isn’t mothers or to praise ourselves.  I realized how arrogant we were to declare one of the Lord’s Days as “Mothers’ Day”.  We were taught that if we didn’t recognise this day, then we were horrible children.  How worse it is to take Glory away from the Lord on this day.

The other ironies I noted was that a third of the sermon had been directed to children obeying their parents…yet all the children (and younger mothers that were to ‘teach’ them) had been removed from the sanctuary already.  Thus, the majority of those that the sermon applied to were not even in the room to hear the Word preached.  And the warnings I had received before service, along with the looks I received during service, let me know that my babe and children were not welcome.  I did end up in the foyer for a time where I listened to the children downstairs yelling and screaming like the basement was an open air playground.  Toward the very end of the sermon, the music player suddenly went on and one could hear the children being directed in singing sunday songs.  I was thankful that I had kept my children with me, regardless the pressure before service.  My daughter even sat filling in the note taking page that had been handed out.

The Divided Generations…

Mat 19:14 But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven.

There is a war raging within our churches. That for the unity of the family. Today couples cannot even marry without receiving warnings of “if and when you divorce”…these warnings coming from WITHIN the CHURCH! Everyone is segregated into age-based classes. Singles never feel a part of the family culture. And families merely run into eachother from time to time or at meals…but are not truely involved with eachother.

Parents are called to teach their children…not the public or the government or public services.  We aren’t to deprive 5 people and a room full of children of the Grace of hearing the Word preached…just so a few mothers can be rid of their children for a few hours.  Fathers and Mothers aren’t to be putting off that duty.

Singles need be included with the families of the church.  They shouldn’t have to face the world and the workweek as well as the Lord’s Day separated and alone.  They should be invited to supper, included in fellowship, and looked over and prayed for.

Seniors are our gold mine, not just a crochet club or sitting waiting for the latest gossip on the prayer chain to come through.  They are to be watching over the younger persons of the church.  Offering advice as seen neccessary and encouragement often.  Their presence is to be seen as a blessing!  Lead by example…and they can in ways that many cannot.  The OLDER ladies are to teach the younger.  Not just the 30yr olds leading a study for the 20 somethings or the 40’s judging those in their 20’s and 30’s.  THe 60, 70, and 80 yr old ladies of the church have a lifetime of experience, knowledge, and hindsight of 20/20 to share with the rest of us!  Many have lived long enough to not care what is current in society, but rather to recognise what was truely important in life.

The same goes with the men…but as I am a woman, I won’t speak to that part other than to say that the women of the church need to step back and let their men lead.  Men need to take their wives into consideration when dealing with children…but be permitted to make decisions neccesary.  The true should truely work as one.  They will not always be in agreement, but rather they will complement eachother.  Meetings dealing with the family should include both parents or vital information will be lost due to splitting the whole of it by splitting the whole of the couple.   Churches proclaiming to be open to the family as a unit are becoming divisive by Brothers’ Meetings and Sisters’ Meetings, Men’s Accountability and Women’s Studies….and thus thrusting us back into nurseries and babysitters, and families not home with eachother….thus the children run back to the youth groups and being peer raised rather than raised by parents…and on goes the cycle.